Tao Verse 20 Mental Scrabble

Tao Verse 20

Stop thinking and your problems will end.
What difference between yes and no?
What difference between success and failure?
Must you value what others value,
and fear what others fear?
How ridiculous!
In spring, some go to the park and climb the terrace,
but I alone am drifting, not knowing where I am.
I alone don’t care,
I alone am expressionless,
like a newborn baby before it has learned to smile.
Other people have more than they need,
I alone possess nothing.
Mine is indeed the mind of an ignoramus
in its unadulterated simplicity.
I am but a guest in this world.
While others rush about to get things done,
I accept what is offered.
I alone seem foolish,
earning little, spending less.
Others strive for fame,
I avoid the limelight.
Other people have a purpose;
I alone don’t know.
Indeed, I seem like an idiot;
no mind, no worries.
I drift like a wave on the ocean.
I blow as aimless as the wind.
All men settle down into their grooves;
I alone am stubborn and remain outside.
But wherein I am most different from others is
in knowing to take sustenance from the great Mother.
This is the longest verse in the Tao.  I usually open the Tao and a page appears.  This page appeared early morning.  I suggest a partial reading of the verse provides enough (1st paragraph).
“Stop thinking and your problems will end.
What difference between yes and no?
What difference between success and failure?
Must you value what others value,
and fear what others fear?
How ridiculous!”

I exist in this state at times.  Thinking myself into confusion and disbelief at life.  Wondering aloud on perceivable woes.  The strain bends like a rubber band and snaps me back and forth.  Yet, I challenge the torture albeit with exercise and friendship.  This quickly places my harmonious spirit back in step.  Why worry about the unseen or the unrealized?  Well, fear, social comparison, or ego would suffice.  For myself, I acknowledge immediately and work away.  Against digging a deeper hole.  I realize instability comes and goes.

Tao does not teach perfection

Its only message to let go.

what one imagines they control

is a slave to worldly thoughts.

one go here and there

never stable in mind or soul.

Looking only for guarantees

blaming others what they

do to themselves

External blame shields fear of being oneself.  In this ill-perceived loneliness helplessness reign supreme.  This is not the message of the Tao. One should have fellowship on a rock or a crowded concert.  It is the fear of being alone that kill living souls.  We’re afraid of the unknown and cry into pain and death.  Allow yourself to feel such ridiculousness and brush aside.  View peace and instability as the same.  They come and go, learn to live in Tao.  We cannot control anything, not even our breathing.


The Invisible Dragon

The Devil and The First Lady


Her shoes soaking wet…hair ruffles with each step.  The doors swing open hands gripped to punch.  You bastard! Obscenities fueled disrupt public setting, what did you do?  I hate you!…church members visibly puzzled.  Her curvy body swallowed by both genders. The pastor eases toward his self-made distraction.  Silent and stern …she pushes forward.  Her face stiff with unforgiveness…She blurts out, “I’m pregnant”.  The church’s grip on stern piousness challenged….a night woman threatens good faith people.  More so a christian-faith marriage.  The first lady stares on….

The first lady’s stare burns the pastor’s eyes as distant past infidelity fights awaken.  But the mystery woman’s public noise present revelations. Her thickened hipped shifting as she exposes dirty dealings.  These secrets of ‘pay for play’ forced churchgoers to squirm on theirs benches. The body parts to detailed to memorable for dismiss for the first lady…it was true.  Yet, hard believers forced a shoving match verbally and physically onto the harlot truth-teller.  Exhausted, yet unmoved, the unchurched woman made her peace.  The secret unraveled in view for all to hear.  But the first lady remained stoic and unmoved….eerily stable.

The pastor’s dirty used condoms exposed to his flock.  However their loyalty to the faith and man immovable. This dirty Jezebel out the door within seconds…deacons and disciples forcing religious order.  As Satan received the blame, tongue utterances frightened children and visitors alike.  Yet, the first lady flashed little concern…she’s being aware of this woman and others.  Angry fight stares not revisited….surprisingly to the pastor.  Things went back to order quickly in private and public quarters.  The pastor welcomed the disbelief of a nonsensical evil-filled woman.  The first lady understood completely, she’s come across quite a few evil-driven men lately and often.

Easy to betray when betrayed.  Easy to lie when deceived routinely.  The first-lady’s lover understands the rules…not quick or rushed, but strong and consistent.  Her shapely figure required  patients…care. The young 30’s something male invited months ago to rid boredom.  The convenience relationship inside hotel bedroom created a silent pact.  Untraceable by the non attentive pastor who chases loose women of night.  The young male heard her concerns, sympathize with them and received unbelievable pleasures.  She did not see youth but mental strength…subtle mannerism, courage.  The relationship strengthen by her being cared for…the her silence at the church understandable.  The first lady understood how the pastor treats women.

She wonders while her stream moves outside how she got here.  The young male moves gently atop her posture..careful not to disrupt flow. This is not evil she suspect but something from a higher being…she wants it.  She misses it at home…and thus seeks her God given gift to engage in this pleasure many times.


Story by Robert Williams


A Stranger Walking

Stranger in the night

Am I Back?

Yes I am but I was never gone.  you see I can never leave…I must finish what has begun.  What is that you say?  I’m not sure but I believe it has a hold on me…I believe my writing has become better beyond my imagination.   Although my words are simple from  a simple man…I write with some sort of flair….I would say.

Each day I stare beyond the clouds for hope.  What do you say?  Yes Hope, I’m not sure if its needed…but I look for it.  Sometimes its dark and menacing…but I’m not afraid.  I live in my reality and that can’t be that scary.  Or maybe it is…just suppose you find yourself along, waiting for the bus…but it never comes.  What is there left to do…?

Never mind the babble, I have a quest today.  What is it you say?  I think I’ll walk among the universe.  What shoes will I wear, I’m not sure.  But I think my blue or pink will be fine…my eyes will not leave the ground I walk upon….my head heavy with worry.  But this walk is my stroll crafted by my realities and dreams.

Am I back?  I never left.

The Invisible Dragon

Youth Football Embezzlement: Parents Wake Up

by Robert a. Williams

Nothing’s worse than a parent who learns their son’s football organization embezzled funds. The stench is horrific when adults purposely misappropriate funds for personal motives.  But this shady act happens more than we’d like to believe in youth football. A Google search will reveal a rash of youth football league’s funds pillaged by appointed representatives.  From league presidents to board appointed treasurers, embezzling funds almost seems vogue.  Often, and sadly however, culprits had stolen funds for a period of time before being apprehended.  Youth football is big business generating enormous amounts of funds topping in the millions.  Thus, it is time to reign in these private organizations and protect children and parents from misguided league officials.

“Some parents can’t believe the board isn’t pressing charges against the person accused of embezzling approximately $24,140.00 earlier this year.”

Hundreds of youth football leagues are preparing for the upcoming 2014 season.  Parents will invest valuable time, resources, and fees so their sons can participate in an American pastime.  Registration fees and traveling expenditures for all-star teams can increase out-of-pocket expenses for these families.  There is vast amounts of cash moving to and fro in youth football programs.  Thus, board of directors are responsible to assure proper appropriation of these funds.  However, something’s amiss among some football leagues’ accountability apparatus. In other words, adults are cheating and using monies for their personal use.  Consequently, youth football leagues and major stakeholders are witnessing a rash of embezzlement arrests and convictions.  Parents these are not isolated cases.

In several cases of blatant embezzlement, the culprit stole funds over a period of time before being discovered.  One former treasurer embezzled more than $100,000 from her youth football and cheer program during her 2013.  In another case, “a former board member offered no explanation for why she stole $17,621.62 from a youth football sports league.  As a result,  they had to eliminate scholarships for low-income kids because of the financial hit.”

“When the cheerleaders were on stage last year, police say Abercrombie was well on her way to stealing more than $20,000.”

What can parents and stakeholders do to protect our children’s money?  A certain immediate action is to require private football youth organizations utilizing public space accept 3rd party financial oversight.  If these football organizations are required to receive 3rd party certification (e.g., USA Football) to keep children safe when tackling (i.e., Heads Up).  Thus my proposal is not a stretch to require oversight for their financial safety.  Community members must protect children from adults that prey upon them.

Robert Williams is the executive director of Ysportreform.org, a social advocate organization.

Doctoral Journey: My Big Question?

Inblac boy 1980, I walked on to play football at Eastern Illinois University (EIU).  I was the first in my family’s history to attend higher education. However, I hated my experiences at Eastern and developed a stinging anger about postsecondary institutions.  I was overwhelmed, I lacked so much and quickly suffered psychologically, socially, and academically.   When I prepared to leave Eastern in 1984, I felt like an academic holocaust victim and carried scars for the next 25 years.

In essence, I learned nothing, absolutely nothing.  I learned nothing about life, academics, social skills, nothing.  It was not just  EIU but various factors (i.e., poverty, malcontent) contributed to my nasty adventure.  Because it was all about football, the learning environment for me appeared as some sort of movie set.  In it I was the comedian’ set up man.  Seriously, I lacked everything you could imagine to navigate a predominantly all-white institution.  I was a clown crying days and nights. And another thing, it wasn’t my side of town for a circus.

In 2009, I returned to a predominantly all-white postsecondary institution again.  Losing the comic setup guy’s role, I wanted to get the college thing right this time. I began this new journey because of my self-beliefs.  You see back at Eastern my confidence (i.e., academics) was shot to hell.  I had no sincere beliefs I could learn, none.  Add to that, I lacked any sociocultural connections with family members or peers who attended higher education.  Thus, I was alone, silent on an island, crying like hell.

Although my mother’s verbal persuasion did its best, I needed ‘most knowledgeable others’ in so many areas (e.g., academically, socially, and emotionally).  But no one came, so, I cried myself to sleep for four years at EIU.  Northern Illinois University (NIU) racial landscape is similar to Eastern 30 years ago.  There are mostly white students accompanied by mostly white faculty and staff.  Conversely, it can also be hostile at times for non-white students and faculty.  I however am not a teenager as in 1980; consequently, I possess the confidence and abilities to achieve a specific task (e.g., my dissertation).

Northern Illinois University

downloadI have met tremendous professors and students while at NIU.  Caucasians, African-Americans, Native Americans, Chicano Americans, Asian, and Eastern Europeans.  The dam list can go on forever.  But, the most delightful part was these individuals dispensed their knowledge for the sake of my learning and development.  This NIU journey filled with numerous sociocultural tenets convinced me I was not alone, not this time.  Also, I learned more importantly without outsiders’ support you’re doomed or as Mick would say, ‘You’re F^%$ked’.

I’ve had great relationships with many individuals, but also some poor ones as well.  I want to say this before I forget, one problem that sticks with me is deciding my doctoral topic.  I have changed it several times for numerous reasons. Yet, after speaking with Mick and Sue yesterday, I’m convinced that I’ve made the wrong decision in not studying my passion (e.g., football and academic literacy).  These two women illustrated as many have in the past, the doc journey must be about passion.

Put another way, it must be like something stuck in the crack of your behind you can’t reach.  I mean its eating at you this f*&king problem….you just gotta dig up in your crack regardless of who’s looking.  I HAVE TO GET THIS OUT!!!  Yet, I’m delaying digging in my crack because I’ve made decisions based on outside influences.  Thus, the itch isn’t real because I’m faking perhaps.   I feel like I’m at Eastern Illinois again in the 80’s lacking the self-determination to follow my passion (e.g., student-athletes and literacy).

My ideal doctoral topic?: I believe you know by now (Student-athletes’ literacy development) at the secondary and postsecondary level.  I have a special place for this population, oh by the way, I can read and write for hours on this content.  I’ve yet to come across an article that made me dazed or confused.  Really, I can read about it in my sleep, while jogging, and inside the grip of a Great White Shark. Well, maybe a little over the top with the comment.

Working with other athletic social advocates we can begin to help students-athletes put academics first and sports second.  This can occur, because as we know the argument is becoming public (i.e., Northwestern).  The status quo for student-athletes is changing, I have a chance to present scholarship that hopefully would advance the movement.

My Big Question:  Why Fake A Doctoral Passion?

Boy 1